From the Rector…
“Everything I touch seems to get ruined.” Though desperately sad, this has always been one of my favorite lines from Charlie Brown. In A Charlie Brown Christmas, he has just bought a pitiful but very real little tree. His friends have laughed at him for choosing it, and when he takes it home and hangs a single ornament on it, the poor thing falls over. He frowns, shakes his head in defeat, and says, “I’ve killed it. Everything I touch seems to get ruined.”
Of course, we know the rest of the story. Linus and Snoopy swoop in, decorate the tree, and remind everyone that it wasn’t “such a bad little tree” after all. As Linus says, “It’s not bad at all, really. Maybe it just needs a little love.”
Whenever I am feeling defeated or disappointed, I remember those lines, “Everything I touch gets ruined.” Then, I remember that it isn’t really about me at all. When my expectations aren’t being met, it is usually because I have been focused on my own ego—my self-centered desires and wants—rather than being God-focused. When my attention shifts back to God and I trust that His purposes are being worked out, I remember that first and foremost, it is always about love. Everything else stems from that love.
Charlie Brown may think that everything he touches gets ruined, but more likely it is his expectations that are at fault. When he chose the tree, something stirred in his heart. He connected to something deeper than simply a scrawny Christmas tree that drops its needles every time it is touched. His mistake is not that he chose a bad tree; the real problem is that he expected others to be moved in the same way by his choice in trees. His disappointment is not in the tree. His disappointment is in others and their failure to meet his expectations.
Isn’t that often our challenge. We expect others to agree with us, or do what we want, or fit our idea of who they should be instead of accepting people for who they are. When they don’t meet those expectations, we get frustrated or angry or sad—everything seems to be ruined.
We do the same with God. When our plans don’t work out, when illness strikes, or when someone we love dies, we blame God. We may even get angry with him, or, at times, stop talking to him altogether. When God doesn’t meet our expectations, we treat him as though he has somehow failed us.
Putting our expectations on others—even on God—is often a sign that our ability to love has become tangled or wounded. And this kind of broken love harms not only those around us but ourselves as well. When people don’t meet our expectations, we start doubting our own worth. We question our motivations, our beliefs, even our abilities. We forget to love ourselves—and if we cannot love ourselves, how can we truly love anyone else?
Linus is right. When life feels defeated and desperate, that is the time when we most need to love—to love God, to love ourselves, to love one another.
Advent is a season of expectant waiting. I hope and pray that your waiting is in love.
Light and Life,
Candice+