From the Rector…
Though there are several Ancient Greek words for love, three are most commonly found in Scripture and shape our religious understanding of how we are called to love one another: eros, philia, and agape. Eros refers to romantic love, expressed through passion and desire. Philia describes the deep, trusting connection we share with friends and family—a love rooted in mutual respect and companionship. Agape is the most selfless form of love: unconditional, generous, and freely given. It asks nothing in return, though it often inspires love in others simply by being offered.
Last week, Steve and I celebrated our 31st wedding anniversary. I decided to dedicate the week to cultivating love. Since we were going out of town and leaving behind the usual distractions of work and responsibility, it felt like the perfect opportunity to reconnect with one another. And we did. In deepening the love Steve and I share, I noticed something unexpected happening—I began to experience greater love for myself. That in turn opened my heart to others in new ways, even in places where I’m usually more reserved.
After a long boat ride to Mobile Bay and back, we stopped at Lulu’s for a little refreshment. Sitting at the bar, I struck up a conversation with the bartender. She was young, energetic, and full of life—a joy to talk to. We chatted about life at the beach and the summer heat. A few minutes later, Steve spotted the son of a family friend working as a food runner. He tracked him down, and soon we were deep in another lively conversation with yet another young person full of good energy. These might seem like simple interactions, but they left a deep impression on me. They reminded me of the beauty and power of philia love—the love that simply connects us to one another, heart to heart, stranger to stranger.
There were other moments like that, too. Steve has a habit of waving to everyone we pass when we’re out on the water. This trip, I decided to join in. Most people gave a polite wave back, usually the boat captain. But one woman really got into it—waving enthusiastically, as if we were long-lost relatives spotting each other across the waves. I couldn’t help but laugh and return the gesture with equal enthusiasm. From that moment on, I didn’t just raise a hand in greeting—I waved big, made eye contact, and tried to share a spark of joy with everyone we passed. We were strangers, yes, but we were also fellow travelers—connected by water and wind and waves. And that small act of connection brought me great joy. It reminded me of my childhood in a small town where everyone waved—on the street, in the store, from their cars. There was a warmth to it. A sense of belonging.
I thought I’d spend the week cultivating eros love. And I did. But what I didn’t expect was how fully philia love would bloom in my heart—reminding me and encouraging me of the importance in connecting to others. As an introvert, I’m often hesitant to strike up conversations or show outward affection. But last week broke through some of that stoicism. It reminded me how good it feels simply to greet and connect, to love and to be loved.
Even now, after the vacation has ended, my heart still feels full. My hope is to carry that love forward—to keep cultivating philia in every encounter, with spouse and stranger, friend and family member alike. Because being connected to one another brings greater joy than our divisions can ever know.